Unit News for May 2007

by Vic Sartor

With Southern California’s drought continuing, it was decided to poll the membership on whether the members should be asked to participate in a rain dance at the June unit game. There was some controversy as to whether loin cloths should be required or optional, so that was added as a polling question. If you have strong opinions on the subject, be sure to attend the game on May 13th (sic) and make your feelings known. We have no scruples when it comes to trying to boost attendance.

Speaking of unit games, it was nice to see Tom Lill back directing without his cane, although he was doing a passable impression of Walter Brennan as he hopped around for director’s calls. This month’s overall winners were Hans Hehnke and Vito Sartori, with opposite direction winners Cordell Goode and Gary Olson second overall. James Rhodes and George Altinus were the overall “B” winners, followed by Roger Boyar and Richard Patterson.

In other results,the top game of the month was a nice 67.4% effort by Roger Boyar and Ben Harris. Mary Miller and Lynne Parker were a close second with a 66.8%. Also posting 60%+ wins were Marjorie Preston, Clara Satterfield, Susan Ruoff, Herb Stampfl, Penny Barbieri, Helen Wang, Dave Ruoff, Vic Sartor, James Rhodes, Rick Whitham, Clint Lew, Richard Patterson, John Tyner, Genise Hasan, Joe Unis, George Altinus, Edwin Kelly, and Donald Naf. Other winners were Abe Abramawitz, Albert Lax, Jacqeline Fehrenbach, and Joseph Fehrenbach.

Our hand of the month is a real beauty. White vs. Red, you pick up the following gem:

♠ Q J 10 9 8 6 5 ♥ void ♦ A K 10 ♣ A 10 8
As you contemplate whether this is a 1♠ or 4♣ (Namyats) opener, your RHO bids 1♠! Mildly irritated, you pass. LHO now bids 4♥! You are now beginning to get a little irked. These guys can’t push you around like a LOL! When it gets back to you you’re going to make the master bid of 4♠!! Surely partner will figure it out. But wait! RHO now rebids 4♠!! Visions of sugarplums dance in your head. You’re going to pass, draw trump, and maybe set this guy 800 at 100 an undertrick. No, LHO now pulls it to 5♥! You can probably make 4♠ on this hand and you haven’t been able to make a bid yet! Now you’re beginning to froth profusely at the mouth. To avoid starting a rabies panic, you whip out a razor and begin to shave. Then, to at least salvage something on this board, you double 5♥. You get it 1 but only because partner has QJx of hearts. He also has an undisclosed seven-card diamond suit, so all you get are your two minor aces. Plus 200 turns out to be a mediocre score. Some are getting to play and make 5♦ your way (perhaps after your hand makes a brilliant first-round double of 1♠). Ah yes, the bridge gods do have a sadistic sense of humor.

Ciao.


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